Easy and effective relationship building in your newsletter.

Or ... write from the heart to build relationships with the minds.

Relationship building is a magical ability that is the sum of many factors. To be truly effective, you have to combine honesty and reliability with trustworthiness. Throw in a degree of outspokenness, a good measure of charm and the ability to demonstrate empathy with your reader. Some of these attributes are hard to learn if you don't naturally have them, but until you do, your career as a writer of ezines and newsletters may be a struggle.

Let's concentrate here on the key factors that I believe you can learn that will set your writing apart from 99% of the rest, and give you a head start in building relationships with your readers. These are the things you can put into action from today.

The secret to building a great relationship with your list is to stop thinking about the people you write to as a list. Nobody builds relationships with lists - only with people. One to one.

Kickstart Today, the newsletter I've been writing for years, is read by thousands of subscribers, but every single paragraph is, in my mind at least, written to just one person. It may be a reader who asked a question. Sometimes it is a close friend who I imagine is sitting in front of me. Next issue it may even be you.

There are hundreds of other people who have written to me over the years and told me what they like and dislike, what their problems are and what they need to know. So when I'm writing about a particular subject it is easy for me to imagine that I'm writing it for that one specific person.

Then, the funny thing is that I get emails from all kinds of other people saying 'how did you know that that was *exactly* what I wanted to hear?' Like astrological star signs there are only so many problems to go round. Write about one and you'll resonate with hundreds of people.

Everybody loves to eavesdrop, but the reality is by writing one-to-one, everyone will think you are writing to them personally. But as soon as you write one-to-many, it becomes impersonal and bland.

There are two often-repeated bits of advice that you'll hear time and again:

1. Eliminate the I's and Me's and maximize the 'you's'.

2. Sell something to your list every message to 'train' them to be more receptive.

Both are nonsense if building relationships that are what you want to do.

The information that you provide in your writing is only one reason that people read what you have to say. Newsletters that are totally focused on topic tend to be quite boring to read. There is no personality. You can't build a relationship if you write like a text book. It is vital - especially online - to inject yourself and your life into what you write.

In my opinion - and experience - you simply can't talk about yourself too much! Whenever I talk about my family and friends, the number of emails I get from subscribers eager to know more rockets! Of course, you can't run a newsletter that is entirely about you! That stuff should only be the icing on a rich, content-filled cake.

The best ezines and newsletters balance both, providing a cocktail of solid factual information punctuated by the real-life soap opera content that keeps the reader coming back for more.

It is the personal information that is most effective for relationship building because the same things are happening in the lives of each one of your readers to a greater or lesser extent. By sharing your humanity you are putting yourself at the same level as the reader. Each time he or she say's 'yes, that's happened to me' or 'I thought that too' you have found a new best friend.

The other advice - that you should attempt to sell something with every communication - needs a very special kind of writer to manage successfully.

I know of a few newsletters that manage it to perfection - and the readers hardly realize they've been sold to - but most just come across as pushy and spammy.

In my own newsletters, I've always stuck to the principle that I only recommend things I've used myself and can honestly say are worth the money. If that means I only recommend something every few weeks, so be it. At least my readers know that the recommendations, when they do come, are heartfelt. And I believe my response rates bear out my policy!

Another important aspect to relationship building is how frequently you publish.

It is hard to build a close relationship with your readers if you don't get to talk to them very often. It is tough to allow your readers to get to know you if you only 'speak' to them once a month, for example. As everything moves so fast online, even weekly publication can be too little unless you are a powerful writer.

Once the writing bug gets to you and words begin to flow naturally, you may want to consider publishing at least twice a week. My own Kickstart Today started out life as a five times a week publication and the biggest complaints I ever got was when I reduced to 'just' three times a week!

So long as you hold your readers' attention, the only complaints you'll get will be when you miss an issue.

Naturally, the strongest writing you can put in your newsletter is that which you've written yourself. Tempting as it is to use other people's articles, if you want to build a relationship with your readers, the majority of what they read from you should be by you.

On that subject, a lot of publishers still use guest articles. While that isn't necessarily a bad thing, the best writing by far that you can publish is your own. As you build your relationship with your readers they will want to hear about you, your life and what you think. If you are going to effectively give them that, you just have to get on and learn to write. Or more accurately, learn to communicate.

Which brings us to another old chestnut: grammar. The grammar you use in your newsletter should have more in common with the conversations you have with your friends than with anything you ever learned at school.

Effective, relationship-building writing flows. It isn't stilted and it doesn't fuss over starting sentences with 'and' or 'but'. It isn't a bad thing to contract words (so long as you put the apostrophe in the right place!) and informality is key.

Which brings us full circle. Write as you would talk to a close friend who is sitting in front of you. You don't hard sell your friends and you don't worry too much about perfect sentence construction. It is all about communicating a message - and my message to you is that relationship building is only effective when you do it one person at a time.

Article Source: http://blogticles.com

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